Wednesday, March 14, 2007

As I have noted in the past, my area is Nija central. There are a lot of Nigerians in the surrounding towns and in the state of Maryland, in general. That being said, I was shocked and horrified to discover that a news article I heard about recently involved a Nigerian.

Amara Eden is a mother of 5 children between the ages of 6 years and 6 months. She was arrested for and charged with child neglect. She left her children alone and unsupervised in a basement apartment that was filthy and absolutely disgusting from the pictures shown on the news.

She allegedly informed a police officer that in her home country, it is a shame to go to jail. She is right. But, it is a shame to not take care of your children, as well. We all know that times are hard, it takes a lot to raise and care for children. However, if you see or read about the conditions these children lived in, well, you would be speechless.

There were options available to this woman and her children if she needed help caring for her kids. Maybe she did not know. It is unfortunate that her children had to suffer the consequences. Her youngest has cystic fibrosis and all the children are suffering from respiratory problems.

It is possible that she suffers from depression or some other mental and/or emotional condition that impaired her judgment. But, I wonder if she loved her children because on the news tonight it was alleged that she said she would have simply killed herself rather than return to her home only to be arrested.

I just hope that she gets the help she needs. Even more important, I hope that those children recover and forget about this madness. I wonder where their father[s] is/are? Did they have any family members that could have interceded on their behalf? We have to keep our eyes out for each other. Maybe someone could have offered to care for those poor children while she worked or did whatever it was that she was doing when she left those children alone for hours in their own filth.

We must learn to ask for help when needed. It doesn't make you a weak person to acknowledge that you can't do everything alone. Life is hard for all and we can only manage together. I wish I could have done something to prevent this from happening.

12 Curiosities. Add Yours.:

Lolita said...

I noticed your comment on the other blog and just in case you were referring to my responses; my responses were made with respect to the statements uttered by another.

For the umpteenth time, I was not equating both acts, please read the preceding comments. It was a mere, albeit unsuccessful, attempt to bring that commentator’s attention to other lifestyles that people live everyday knowing that there will be consequences but ignoring them anyway.

Regarding the bill, I did however mention that I felt the bill was a little out there. But people, specifically some Nigerians tend to ignore the full context of any dialogue and would rather persecute based on a word, sentence or phrase that they did not happen to like.

So we all went on that blog and everyone had their fair share of ranting but for those specifically living in Nigeria; were they not aware that such a bill was in the process of being passed before a NY Times editorial got published for another foreigner to publish on his blog?

I stand by what I said; a bill should be passed to curtail same sex marriages! Nigeria is already the most populous country in Africa but the population is dwindling. Those that aren't being killed off by HIV/AIDS are dying of Malaria or Typhoid or Sickle Cell Anaemia or poverty or something. Like you noted in your response not everybody has the ability to get on a presidential jet, off to a foreign country for proper healthcare.

So when everybody dies and there are no heterosexual couples to reproduce, then tell me what happens next? I know this may sound a little far-fetched but it is conceiveable.

Just like here in the States, Lawmakers pass and remove and revamp laws on a regular basis, constituents vote and laws are then enacted.

If Nigerians are really that concerned about these laws, they need to make sure they go out and vote for leaders who will listen to their cries of woe.

There is much to discuss about Naij but I'll stop here.

Waffarian said...

Yeah.....that was really sad..I am sure the Nigerian community could have helped!They could have put those churches out there to good use! Hope the kids are okay!

Waffarian said...

Just noticed Lolita's comment,

"So when everybody dies and there are no heterosexual couples to reproduce, then tell me what happens next? I know this may sound a little far-fetched but it is conceiveable."



@ Lolita: Thanks for stopping by. My coments at Naijablog, were not an attack on your comments but rather a response to the general track the discusion had taken.

Again thanks for stopping by.


Madam Waffy: Good to see ya! You are right, our community should have stepped in before this madness took place. Just up the road from where Ms. Eden lives is a large Redeemed Churh. Nothing but geles, buba and iros on Sunday morning. This is the second situation involving a Nigerian family in the news over the last few weeks. Unfortunately, I am moving and will not be able to set up a system/structure for our people to ocme together and help each other in this area. But, there are several naija folk here, so I am sure something will happen.

As to your comments to Lolita, na how far now? Youna dey bring your wahala come my blog! A beg oh! Peace and unity - isn't that part of our national anthem? We must all find a way to agree to disagree, respectfully. Pretty please? Thanks people!

Waffarian said...

Hehehehehe! abeg oh! I no find wahala reach this side oh! na "by mistake" i notice that comment! so u dey "thank" Lolita with that her long post, you even "thank" am twice, and me, u dey talk about national anthem! hehehehehe, anyway, wetin concern agbero with overload? una do well!


LOL! Waffy, haba now! Peace and Unity, peace and unity. Abeg make you no vex. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Oya, I don thank you 3 times. Besides, my response to your comment was longer. Ah, you sef!

Lolita said...

Solomonsydelle, thanks for the response. I took the time to communicate to you on your blog because you are intelligent and sometimes in a war of words, true meaning and intent gets lost in translation.

You have several blogs and I noticed we like a few things in common, I will continue to visit. Cheers :)


Howdy Ms. Lolita: Thanks for the compliment. You are right, meaning and intent can and do get lost in translation. Or, people simply read what they want into your statements.

Anyway, please feel free to stop by any of the blogs when you can. I like the company =) Cheers right back at ya!

Waffarian said... so my sister! heheheheheheh, no wahala!

Calabar Gal said...

Its really sad about Amara's Plight. If you dont work, no food comes in and then if you go to work, you have to make proper arrangements about child care and stuff. I cant help but wonder where her husband or boyfriend or the father of those kids are. Why did she keep on having more kids knowing in the diaspora that childcare is quite expensive? How tired was she coming back homefrom work each day that she couldnt tidy up the room and why on earth would she keep a dog inside with the kids? I feel sorry for her but cant help feeeling some disdain also for her actions.

I know what it is like to be a single mom in the diaspora having lived with a friend who was a single mom and was always in a fix who to leave her daughter with when she had to go to work or somewhere important. 6 kids - the youngest 6months and the oldest 6yrs means she was having kids almost every yr. I suppose the word contraception just dosent exist in her dictionary.


@ Calabar girl: My sentiments exactly. Taking care of one child is hard enough, but 5 and a dog? I still have not heard anything about her support system (husband/boyfriend/family members) and probably won't. Unfortunately, those children are now in the foster system - and they should be with a family member. Well, God will have to take control of that situation and I pray for a good outcome for all th children. Thanks for stopping by!

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