THE GOODLUCK CONSPIRACY

Goodluck Jonathan seemed to be in need of some luck until recently. Before becoming the new Vice President of the Federal Republic of Nigeria, he encountered a few serious 'mishaps'.

In December 2006, his campaign offices were bombed. This was later followed by the partial destruction of his 'country' home which suffered the wrath of explosives Additionally, news reports alleged that there was an unsuccessful attempt to kidnap him.

Now, who would want to hurt good old 'Goody'? In a country as complex as Nigeria, the answer could be anyone and everyone. It is safe to speculate that someone wanted to hurt Goody. As I am a sucker for conspiracy theories, I'll espouse a few of my own on this issue.

Anti-Militia Interests

There are those with a keen interest in discrediting militant groups such as MEND. Arguably, MEND has local support because it aligns itself with the needs of the people and fights for their improved welfare. That being the case, a successful attack on Goody could be attributed to MEND and then used to discredit it and other groups. They would be accused of not having the people's interests at heart because they attacked a 'son of the soil' who could have used his position as Vice President to effect positive change for the people of the Delta.

Such a tactic to discredit and embarrass militants would have extremely limited success. Considering the fact that Goody didn't seem to do much for Bayelsa State (he is the former governor), I don't think that resident of the Delta, or Nigerians for that matter, will jump to the conclusion that militants sabotaged the regions chance for change.

This tactic could nevertheless prove effective in giving additional ammunition to the government to send more soldiers to the region and give more access to American troops who already patrol the Gulf of Guinea. The result could be a bloodbath that might not necessarily lead to a weakened militant operation in the region. In fact, the resulting bloodbath could spill far beyond the porous borders of the Niger Delta and impact the entire Republic.

Anti-'Southern' Interests

Okay, this is a sensitive subject, so if you REALLY do not like conspiracy theories, skip this section. Now, for the rest of you 'wey get liver plenty' (translation: brave people), please consider the following.

Remember those horrible rumors that OBJ selected Yardy for President with hopes (and according to the harsher speculators - knowledge) that he (Yardy) would die? Well, let us take that rumor a step further, for curiosity's sake. What if OBJ selected a northerner, Yardy, so he could die and leave Goody, a Southerner, as President? He would have satisfied the northern 'talking heads' by providing a hand-picked northern candidate and satisfied southerners by selecting Goody as the Vice President.

Goody's recent bad luck could therefore be a result of agents that want to prevent a southerner from becoming President if some reason Yardy were to become incapable of fulfilling his duties as President. I know this might seem far fetched to some, but for me, a regular conspiracy loving political junky, this theory has more meat than bones.

Anti-Foreign Interests

There could be those that wished to attack the potential V.P. so as to remove any doubt that the Delta is a lawless area. Imagine, if the hand-picked Vice Presidential nominee had been seriously hurt or even killed, most of the foreign owned operations that remained in the Delta would have evacuated completely. That could leave the region open to new investors who could come in and have a better bargaining tool (after all, others left due to security concerns).

Anti-Goody Interests

Of course, there could be elements who simply dislike Goody and want him gone. I could never speculate on who those could be but we all know that no one gets to become Vice President of any country without developing enemies of some shape and form along the way. Therefore, the recent attacks on Goody could simply have been the result of a few burnt bridges.

Regardless of the flexing of my scheming mind, I am happy to report that the last I heard of Goody and Yardy, they were both in good health and apparently busy serving the country. In fact, the Vice President was recently visiting with fellow Ijaws, reassuring them that Yardy's administration has their interests at the top of his list of things to do. He was very well received by the Ijaws who welcomed their 'son of the soil' with open arms. We shall see...

Anyway, I am quite sure that as the new V.P., Goody has good protection and I do not anticipate anything negative happening to him. The above has simply been the ramblings of a curious mind....

By the way, the one month MEND gave Yardy is officially up.